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Relationships > Dating Someone with Kids
 Posted by spyderchick
Dec 12, 2006 08:48 PM
Dating Someone with Kids
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There are a lot of things to take into consideration when dating someone with kids. It is usually a good idea to take the relationship slow and perhaps a little cautious; after all you also have their feelings to think about. Young kids tend to become attached to people very quickly and if things don't work out for the two of you they could be hurt. Older kids have a tendency of being resentful to the new person in their parent's life. It is always a good idea to get to know each other better and make sure you want to continue dating before meeting the kids.
At the same time, dating someone with kids can give you a great opportunity to enhance your life by knowing the kids. You also need to understand that if you date someone with kids, they will be a part of your lives no matter what. Below are a few pros and cons to take into consideration when dating someone with kids.
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Stability
Dating someone with kids usually means you have found someone with stability in their life. They are normally settled down and most likely know what they want their future to hold.
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Family life
If you love children and the family life dating someone with kids will give you the opportunity of having that immediately. It can be very fulfilling and rewarding to become a part of a family.
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Focused
Most single parents stay focused on what is really important in life. They are strong and very responsible which makes for an opportunity to have a real lasting relationship, if this is what you are searching for.
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Resentment
Kids can sometimes resent their parent dating someone else; they may feel like the missing parent is being replaced. This means a lot of resentment for you because you are the one they feel is trying to step in.
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Self-confidence
Single parents tend to have self-confidence and are very self-reliant; normally they want a real and meaningful relationship.
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Having enough time for everyone
Having children can be very demanding so when you date someone with kids there is a possibility that they may not have a lot of free time for dates.
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Appreciation
Someone with kids understands the value of life, they know what is important and what is superficial. They know how to get the most out of the time you spend together.
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Ex-partners
If the person you are dating is divorced, then you may have problems with the ex-husband or ex-wife.
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Partner or new parent
Sometimes a person may be more interested in finding a parent for their child, instead of a partner for themselves. When dating someone with kids you need to make sure of their intention before becoming seriously involved.
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Finding a babysitter
Sometimes it can be very difficult to find a good reliable babysitter so you can have the opportunity to go out on dates. It can also be rather expensive.
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Adjusting
Adjusting to a "pre-made" family takes work from all sides. It will take time, communication and effort to make everyone feel comfortable.
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